High atop...

hummm...there seems to be some sort of human lying on my couch....

 I have conquered the mountain...now if only I had a Gracie flag to set up...

never mind...I'll just take a nap instead

there must be a setting...

there must be a setting on here for food...if i could just get my paws on it for a second...

must be nice...

There is a park sitting in this backyard. Let me repeat - there is a PARK sitting in this backyard! Why am I the only one excited about this? You're all sitting around shmoozing over lunch and i am simultaneously at someone's home and at a park! This is incredible!! So maybe it's just a huge backyard but it definitely has the park de jour...still there's something missing...hang on...it'll come to me...

ah, there it is.  Essential different between enormous backyards and parks:
1. no crumbs left behind from picnics
2. no other doggy smells to discover
3. no other friends to play with

In other words, gorgeous lonely landscape.

The expensive lawn furniture isn't stocked with pee-mail, the grass isn't hiding left-over food, and i'm just lying here quietly next to you until you're ready to leave (and also just in case you drop some food.)

So while it must be nice to live with the luxury of a park-sized yard, nothing takes the place of hearing "Gracie, you wanna go to the park?" everyday and both of us slipping into the sanctuary of friends and laughter that we find there...


plus the dropped food!

finger pointing

It's not nice to point fingers.  We don't like to blame or shirk responsibility but really, we're going to.  Because we had absolutely nothing to do with this...

Call it a misunderstanding.  Call it a communication break down.  Call it a disaster.

Either way, we're biding our time and waiting for the hair to grow...

Do you think if we stare at the claws, the hair will grow faster?? Maybe if I lick them constantly it'll help...

Bad groomer! Bad groomer!

A day...

Let's have a chat, shall we?

New ground rules.

You may not take me to the groomers to get a bath on Monday followed by a haircut Tuesday AND getting my teeth cleaned.

One trauma per day please.

Are we clear??

Conversations

She got mad at me for not listening this morning.  She grabbed my face and spoke in that spooky quiet voice that means “I’m very angry and trying hard to control myself right now.”  She got mad and I didn’t even realize that there was a problem.  It wasn’t that I wasn’t listening to her yell “Come, Gracie, Come right now!” it was just that it was background noise.  I couldn’t really hear her over the siren call of the French fries lying in the grass combined with the thrill of approaching dogs to go greet.  So I wasn’t trying to be bad or ignore her.  Her message just didn’t get through. 

That’s the thing with this whole talking bit.  I have to be a) paying attention, b) know what the words mean, and c) able to understand her, and d) willing to engage in the conversation.  That’s a lot of requirements to be fulfilled all of the time.  She just assumes that her voice is the only one I’m paying attention to.  What she doesn’t realize is that there’s the lull of the wind, the noise of traffic, the swish of other dog tails wagging, and the screams of cat food lying in the grass all competing for my attention.  I know that she carries treats for me, but frankly, given the choice between carrot slices and French fries…I mean come on, I’m not an idiot!

It’s it the same with you humans? Don’t you have lots of voices swirling around those big heads of yours? Don’t you have nagging thoughts of to-do lists, ponderings about events earlier in the day, anxieties about things to come mixed with the chatter of your friends? Isn’t it sometimes hard to focus on what the person in front of you is saying? No one is getting your hearing checked or assuming you’re misbehaving when you zone out.  Or is it only me that happens to?

Wait…what was I saying?

Sorry, I got lost in the scent of my stuffed toy for a second and distracted by the bird outside…were we having a conversation?

New Years Resolutions...maybe

For 2012, I, Gracie Joy, resolve to:

1. Come when called except when i find something really good to sniff or eat, in which case I'll come when I'm good and ready...ie when the food has all been eaten
2. Cover you with puppy licks for as long as you'll leave uncovered skin in my presence
3. Be exuberantly overjoyed every time you walk in the door even if you've only been gone long enough to switch the laundry
4. Not hold a grudge even when you pry discovered chicken bones out of my mouth
5. Allow you to zip me up in frilly pink coats but only for the warmth factor and not because I care about appearances or anything...although I must admit I look pretty cute in my pink puffy jacket
6. Eat every morsel of food in my bowl and then make continual checks every three minutes from then on out just in case you've added more food
7. Adore you even when you're crabby
8. Play fetch for as long as you want as long as you've got something tasty for me when I return the ball
9. Stop and sniff every blade of grade and each petal of every flower to appreciate the beauty of nature...and pee
10. Remind you by example to stop doing and just lie down and cuddle with me
11. Listen to you and do what you ask...again, just not in the face of food...in that case i may have a case of selective hearing loss
12. Love you unconditionally no matter what you look like, what kind of mood you're in, or how successful you are.  

Then again, these resolutions aren't really a stretch for me...it's kind of just me being a dog. 

 Hummm wonder if they still count.  Perhaps a better title would be "What a dog does naturally"!